After Death, Afterlife

His last moment is coming. I can sense it. I’ve been at his bedside, together with his family members. Although of course, they can’t see me. His family members have been in this spiraling depression for nearly two weeks, but I can’t help feeling cheerful. Some part of this is selfishness, but I believe that there isn’t a single soul that can resist the urge to speak with their lover, after being separated for fifty years. 

The beeping sound halts, and the electrocardiogram turns into a straight line, stretching along the horizon, extending forever, into the afterlife. I am so excited that I can almost feel the beating heart, for the first time in fifty years. What will be the first thing he’ll say when he sees me? 

The spiritual part of him has left its physical shell and is sitting upright on the bed. I conceal myself in the corner of the room, not wanting to disrupt his farewell with the family. He tries to touch his children and grandchildren but can’t quite feel them. Then he understands. He symbolically kisses all his family members, and decides to go on. 

It is my time. I go beside him quietly, and wait to see his reaction. He goes back to his twenties, the version of him that I always remember. Initially, he doesn’t see me. But then he turns, and sees me right in front of him. I am watching him intently. There’s a flicker of surprise, excitement, but not without pain in his eyes. Then he turns his back on me, gives a nod acknowledging my presence, and signals me to lead him. 

That flicker of surprise, the excitement, and the pain was enough for me. Enough to indicate his recognition of me. But there is an inexplicable disappointment rising in my chest. Shouldn’t he should be more excited? Shouldn’t he say something? I am not going to be the first one to speak, and he knows it. 

I lead him to my acquaintance, the Grim Reaper. The reaper must realize how important he is to me, because I seldom lead people to him. He raises an eyebrow, and I nod in confirmation.

The reaper offers him a chair. “You have had a virtuous life, so according to the rules of Heaven and Hell, you are given the right to choose whether to drink this cup of Forgotten Tea. This tea will erase all of your memories from your past-life.” He will definitely not drink that, I am sure of it. How can he choose to forget our precious memories? 

“I will drink it.” Then in a swift movement, he takes a huge gulp from the cup. It all happened so quickly and I couldn’t stop him in time. Then it registers. “How could you drink that! You know how long I have been waiting for you! Fifty years! How, how could you betray me like that! Because of you, I have nowhere to go! Neither heaven nor hell will accept a person like me! You betrayed me!” I shout. So after all I was the first to speak. 

He doesn’t say anything. Instead, he turns to me and takes my hand. First, the only thing I feel (this time I am sure I feel, for the first time in fifty years) is the skin of his delicate hand. Then, I begin to see visions. I saved him in the war, but died. He kneeled in front of my tomb for three days and cried. Then he decided to forget. To conform. Our love is cursed in the first place, these visions say, and he is too guilty and pained to keep remembering. I owe you, his visions say.

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But I have a feeling, and I know that he will never forget. Not even in his afterlife. The tea won’t work on him.

He released my hand and began walking towards the afterlife door. I didn’t know he had been suffering so much because of my death. My death isn’t even a big deal to me, but he had the tendency to take everything too seriously, and remember everything too intently. I am the person who should be sorry. I am responsible for his guilt. 

He has opened the door to the afterlife. It is then that I notice his intentions. He is not going up. He is looking down. Then he looks at me, mouths goodbye, and leans back. He begins to fall. 

No. I rush to the door. I lean myself back. I also begin to fall. I catch up with him. He is surprised first, then his eyes, those beautiful sapphire eyes are filled with tears.

I hear the prayers of the Grim Reaper, hoping we can be together afterlife. He still doesn’t know where we are heading.

There’s no turning back. Hell is a one-way ticket.

But God, how happy I am to be with my lover, even in hell. All the blessings. 

We lock each other in a hug as we fall down forever.